Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Dear Samurai,

This letter comes a few days late and I apologize for that.  I am balancing a great many things right now in our life and quiet time like this does not come frequently or easily.  But here I am at last, writing your birthday letter.  Seven years and five days ago you decided it was time to enter this world.  I was blessed and privileged to have the heart, mind, spirit, strength and support to choose a home birth.  This act of love and trust in you and in myself, I feel, was hugely instrumental in growing and nurturing the beautiful, loving spirit you possess.

The moment you were conceived our lives were irreversibly interconnected.  Thank you for trusting me with your life, I cherish it as I cherish my own.  You have been one of my greatest and most important teachers.  What I have learned from you in our seven years and five days together I could have spent a lifetime trying to figure out on my own, had you not come into my life to show me the way.  What I feel for you is a love beyond description, though I have tried and will continue to try to capture it with words (it's just something I do).

I have been growing and you have been afraid.  I want you to know I will never outgrow you.  Our family will never get too big for you to have your special place.  You will always fit, perfectly, in my arms, and you will always have a peaceful resting place in my heart.  I want you to know it's okay to be afraid, it's okay to need reassurance, and I will always have more love to offer you when you need it.  Always.  My love for you is unlimited and can never be exhausted.

My wish for you this year is that your heart remain open to all we are about to welcome into our lives.  I am working relentlessly so that I can be the light that guides the way, so that there are not so many shadows or dark places to get lost inside.  I can feel myself shining a lot of the time, and so I know my hard work is paying off.  I hope you can see and feel this too.

My wish for you every day is that you feel happy and safe.  Proud of who you are and proud of our family.  You, my Samurai, are a work of heart.  Happy birthday baby.

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